Last night I crystallized … a few … insights in the children-of-night Discord channel.
I have a low grade phenomenal mental inflammation, and have had it for years.
This inflammation affects the perceived unity/stability of my sense of self.
What I commonly perceive to be “I” is my conscious/metacognitive awareness mediated through my reading-writing networks, and is therefore an objective fraction of my mind/brain.
“I am” is transient. It can “die” but more often it fades out on the time scale of seconds to minutes to maybe hours. (In the case of my severely depressive episode in March 2019 it was most likely days.)
In this transience, the “we are” of all the other embodied and non-embodied parts of my mind rises.