I'm rambling now. It's been a while since I've done that. Maybe it's because I feel whole-chest anxious again. I still can't quite visualize my future. There's too much I'm not doing. How can I ever settle down with someone if I don't even know what my life will look like six months from now?
Just earlier today I was thinking about The Cryptographer and Mubashir and the whole shebang of AI-assisted writing and it hit me that I'm kind of doing manual daydreaming. I think all my works are self-inserts to an extent, so each back and forth with the base model is kind of like seeing into the future. Ladon is fitfully insecure. That's not a coincidence.