Morning. Somehow I was able to wake up decently early around 8:05 even though I had slept late last night again, around 1:05am. (Stress is getting to me, as you can tell.) Waited for my brother for a good 25 or so minutes, then got ready over an NPR Tiny Desk Concert of Lianna La Havas. Went to Main Street Bagel in San Jose, and got some coffee from the nearby Starbucks (I just had water). I got a pastrami sandwich on an everything bagel. Pastrami wasn't too salty; I wish there were a bit more mustard, and it was actually on an everything bagel. They got mixed up with my brother's lox on plain. Parents got a couple blueberry bagels with cream cheese schmear.
Afternoon. Gray, gray, gray. Made some coffee, 21g/350ml. Fuck, I've missed my Fellow Ode 2 and Hario Switch. Bounced between Tumblr, Discord, and a little bit of Xitter. Pivoted into Helios — which, alongside many resteeped mugs of hojicha, powered me right through until evening. Mom spent most of the day making some spiced green fish stew and noodles (nom pachok) and I dug in around 4:30. So, so good.
Evening. Went on a walk around the neighborhood with mom. Bit of a mistake: I was only wearing my inner shirt and a puffer, without a third (inner) layer so I felt like I was going to keel from the cold. We talked about university and Seth's own plans for the future. Apparently my younger brother's getting a bit flighty on his university plans. Came back home. Continued to power through Helios; revised a definition of autopoiesis (not self-creating, it's self-maintaining!) and I felt the nearly-forgotten thrill of working with abstractions and theories. Nothing against evidence — just that I was a little bogged down. Also re-read my notes, really re-read them, and added some telegraphic titles that stimulated further relations/connections between notecards. Ironically, my heuristic of notecards-as-precedent seems to have overstayed it's explanatory power — I've just been worrying about it than actually letting my notes rest and seeing what happens. Seems like I've got a bunch of dualities in Helios: inner vs. outer notecard forms, gist vs. verbatim indexing, linear-narrative vs. lateral-schematic relations.
Night. Started writing this entry, was about to send an apology to Mubashir only to find that his account was missing. I'll tell you, the utter fear I had thinking I was (rightfully) blocked for basically ignoring him for 3 days was incredible. Checked from an alt and couldn't find him either so he was most likely deactivated. Asked Sasha if they knew much and they reassured me that he wouldn't block me for that. Well, alright. (I know I would, though...) Continued writing this entry.