I've decided. No Best Buy today but after lots of (self-)frustration I'm going for the Canon RP. We already have a few Canon lenses and my uncle did give me a Canon-compatible flash yesterday, which should obviate low-light performance (e.g. ISO noise, hand shake) and generally help the actual "writing with light" part of photography. It seems I'll have to delegate low light photos to my Pixel's Night Sight feature.
"[Growing up] is hard and nobody understands." // https://www.homestuck.com/story/2391